Dealing with Criticism

“If you keep your head when all about you are losing theirs and blaming it on you” is a line from Rudyard Kipling’s famous poem “If.” There are probably many of us who can identify with the words and understand the frustration of being misunderstood or unfairly judged.

 

Almost every day either we or someone we love experience this frustration. Faced with being misunderstood we respond. How we respond is according to the poem, the measure of our manhood (equally woman hood). Learning how to respond to criticism and to deal with the negative things people say to us is a step of maturity and personal development. 

 

Criticism is an attack on our self-esteem and our defensive attitude is the way we try to protect our self from a painful experience. Just as we put up our hands to prevent ourselves being physically hurt, we put up our defensive attitude to prevent emotional or mental health. 

 

This defensive attitude may either take on an apologetic attitude. We make apologies for our behavior or those of others, or it may take on an attacking attitude, where we tend to look for ways of blaming others for the situation so we can share the blame and perhaps take some of the heat off our role in the situation. 

 

What are some positive ways we can respond to criticism so that the negative reaction we instinctively feel can become something positive in our life and a tool for self-development and personal maturity? 

 

• Look on any incident of criticism. As an opportunity for learning and self-growth not as an attack on your self-esteem. 

• Much of the anger that eventuates from criticism has the risk of becoming a grudge against the person delivering the criticism that creates its own set of problems. Make a determined effort to forgive the person who has given the criticism and actively seek to work with them to negotiate a solution you are both satisfied with.

• When you are receiving criticism, try to take a step back before you respond. Thank them for their words and tell them you will consider what they have said to you and discuss it with them on another occasion. This approach enables both of you to calm your emotions and to discuss the situation later when you both have had chance to think about it.

• Think about the criticism; ask yourself if it is justified. If it is, then seek ways to prevent the situation recurring and, if it is not, take steps to refute it calmly and preferably with evidence. 

• Don’t dwell on the criticism but move on. Your value is not determined by one piece of criticism. 

Do Not Underestimate the Importance of 5 Minutes

Does your life seem out of control? Do you always feel like you are running from one activity to the next without taking a break? 

 

Never underestimate the importance of 5 minutes. No matter how busy a day we have, we all have 5 minutes to spare in our day and it can do so much to change our perspective on the pressures of our life in the here and now. 

 

What can be accomplished in 5 minutes and how does it help our journey of self-discovery?

 

• Take 5 minutes each day to clear out some clutter in your life. Maybe a work area, a pantry or a garage. Allow yourself to enjoy the moment when you have completed it! Clutter free lives help us to think more clearly and to focus on our work. Research shows that people with a tidy work area achieve more productivity than those with a cluttered area. 

• Take 5 minutes to go for a walk and find something beautiful in your world you haven’t seen before. It will open up a way to count the other blessings in your life that often stay hidden from view as we are often too busy to enjoy them. 

• Take 5 minutes to do some exercise and marvel at how much fitter you feel today than you did yesterday. If you don’t have time to exercise for long periods during the day, 6 lots of 5 minutes add up to a 30-minute workout every day. 

• Take 5 minutes to pray, meditate or have some periods in your day, where you reflect on yourself and your spiritual health and well-being. If you believe in God, ensure you protect this time in the business of your day as spiritual well-being is an important part of a holistic approach to life.

• Take 5 minutes to fix a proper meal for your family and not find yourself too busy so you buy take away every night. Your body needs good nutrition. Ensure you have plenty of vegetables and fruit as well as lean protein and good carbohydrates and oil in your diet to maintain your body in good health. Enjoy the difference it makes to your energy levels.

• Go to bed 5 minutes earlier each night so you re-create sleep and wake cycles help maintain your focus and alertness. 

 

Never underestimate the power of 5 minutes in your life! 

How to Deal with Behaviors that Irritate You in Others

We all know what it is like to have people in our lives who irritate us and we prefer to avoid them. Maybe we can’t understand why we feel the way we do about them, and we are upset with ourselves for always reacting as we do to them. How can we understand our responses to them and how can we understand where the feelings come from that create these reactions in us? 

 

Each of us have developed a set of values that determine how we think and feel about life, including right and wrong behaviors and attitudes. When we see other’s doing things or saying things that are outside our parameters of acceptable behavior we tend to react and respond, usually in a negative way.

 

Learning to accept that what is wrong to us, may not be wrong to others, is an important part of personal development. We may not agree with their choices, but we must allow people to be themselves, which means having values and ideas that may differ from our own perception of what is right and wrong. 

 

The triggers for reactions to behavior we don’t like, often originate in our child hood experiences. If we have been told to eat with our mouth closed, it’s understandable that for us, that behavior is a manner that we consider important for ourselves and our families to try to achieve. When we experience people who have never been taught that behavior who have no personal rules for eating, we can become frustrated with them. Often our values and behaviors become the measure for everyone else’s behavior. 

 

People who live together in the same house, sometimes experience relationship issues when one of the partners expects certain behaviors but the other doesn’t see them as important. Instead of reacting to the other person’s concept of the world and behaviors we need to learn how to accept and even appreciate the differences. 

 

As we do this, we give the gift of unconditional acceptance to the other person, whilst helping to reduce the frustration and anger of our own attitudes to the situation. Of course, there are unacceptable behaviors that no one should accept (domestic violence for example) but most things that irritate us about others are really the product of our own personal thoughts and not based on anything of importance except to ourselves. 

 

We cannot always control our reactions to others’ behaviors that create frustration in us, but we can learn to control the way we see and respond to them. 

Time Out for Renewal and Self Development – 2

 

We have explored the need for time out and renewal as a means of self-development and the importance of prioritizing it in our lives at least once a year. Most people are keen to take the time but struggle with how to achieve it. Here are some suggestions. 

• Discuss with your partner the need for time out. Decide to either take the time out together or individually. If children are involved, enlist the help of grandparents, siblings or friends. Suggest to friends you each take time looking after each other’s children so you can go on a retreat. 

• If taking time out together with a partner ensure you schedule alone time during your retreat as well as time together. Personal reflection is essential to renewal and self-development. 

• Try to allocate some of your annual leave to have at least a day of time out, even whilst you are on vacation. There is no better place to enjoy time out and renewal than when visiting beautiful locations. 

Once you have scheduled time out, it is essential to plan how to take the most benefit from it. Preparing for the journey is as important as being on it, here are some suggested ways to prepare for your time out experience.

• Choose a location that will help you relax. Whether this close to home or some place you will need to travel too, the key is to relax and refresh. 

• Don’t take anything with you that will act as a distraction. If you take your cell phone with you, try to borrow one that does not allow you to be tempted to check email or spend time on the Internet. 

• Do take a personal tape recorder or a journal to enable you to record your reflections and goals as you create them.

• If religion or philosophy is important to you, take a religious book or self-help manual if you would like to use them as meditation and prayer aids. 

 

When you arrive at your time out location and begin the process of self-reflection, here are some guidelines to help focus your thoughts.

 

• Evaluate what causes you to feel sad and happy as you review your life. These will help you focus on those things that need addressing in your life.

• Celebrate the things you have achieved, and goals you have accomplished. 

• Create action plans for those things you feel sad or dissatisfied with.

Time Out for Renewal and Self-Development – 1

In talking to friends this past weekend, it was obvious that many mothers are suffering from burn out and other stress related issues. They commonly say they wish they could be happier and not so snappy with their children and were trying to work out how to keep their children happier and entertained. 

 

Certainly, looking after the children’s needs are important to all parents and consumes a lot of time, but looking after self needs is equally important. Time out is a period of solitude where the focus is on self-development and self-reflection. It can be an extremely beneficial and self-affirming activity. 

 

Do you give yourself permission to take an extended amount of time away from your children, your work or anything in your life causing you stress and burn out? If you don’t, you are not alone. Most people don’t take time out, but look at the benefits of making this a priority at least once a year. 

• Taking extended time out gives the chance to take a step back and decide how to move forward in your life. When you are in the middle of life and all its responsibilities, it’s easy to focus on survival and not on achievement. Take time out each year to make some life goals. They can focus on your family, but having some goals for your parenting, will help you look back on the year and realize what achievements you have achieved in the previous year and what you want to achieve in the coming year.

• Time out is not a selfish activity, but a time to be critical and honest about yourself and your life. Its focus is to improve your relationships and to help your family and friends. Personal Time Out gives you the opportunity to look at your life and your responsibilities, evaluate what you are doing right and how you can improve those things you feel are not going as planned.

Taking a few hours or a few days out of your busy schedule is not running away from your responsibilities, it is rather an opportunity to find your energy and focus again so you can keep “running towards them” and embrace your life and its responsibilities with a new enthusiasm. Decide to make having an annual personal time out a priority in your life and gain assistance from your family to achieve it. 

Choosing the Best Eye Cream for Yourself

In a market where there are many choices for those looking for eye creams, making the right choice is vital, as the wrong choice could lead to damaging the skin, or a product which does not benefit the eye. Bags around the eyes, fine lines, puffiness and dark circles are all signs of ageing which eye creams should be targeting, and will be your first reference point in choosing the right eye product.

 

It is important to know that there are unscrupulous companies who would release a product which is a moisturizer, and market it as an eye cream, without considering the effect on the consumer. The features of an eye cream and those of a moisturizer mean they are two different products, and if you want a moisturizer there are plenty available, but an eye cream has to work as an eye cream, not just look like the real thing.

 

When taking the cost into consideration, ensure you have a budget in mind, and then seeing if the product matches it should be a consideration, as you should need an important reason to choose a product which is more expensive than others which are more competitive.

 

To avoid being the victim of a scam, you should look into the compounds found within the eye cream, as there will usually be studies associating these with eye treatment. Ensuring the product you’re looking at has the right concentration of ingredients to be effective is also important, as the more opportunistic producers will use minimal amounts of some ingredients to reduce their production costs, and then emphasize this in their advertising.

 

Newly-developed products with innovative ingredients will naturally have less published research about them, and in this instance searching for reviews of these creams can give you clues as to what they do to the skin around the eyes. Larger numbers of positive reviews from consumers should give you an indication a product is worth trying, whilst negative reviews from users could suggest you ought to look for another product.

 

However, a product is advertised, or however flashy the packaging, make sure that you judge the cream on the results and how it deals with the signs of ageing, which is why you are buying the cream in the first place. After all, a colored bottle or an impressive promotion doesn't improve the results of the product.

How to Get Beautiful Hair Naturally

Most men and women consider their hair to be very important to how they are perceived, and spend time looking after their hair. The industry providing products for this has seen a large increase in the number of products designed to help people look after their hair. Although there is a general impression that it is mainly women that spend time and money on their hair, research has shown that men as well as women take an interest in how to care for their hair.

 

With a large range of products available to suit every type of hair, there is a product to suit almost every consumer. However, even products that can be found in the everyday kitchen can be used for a more organic approach to hair care. Here are details of a few of products that can help provide the best hair, listed according to hair type.

 

People who have greasy hair have to consider using products specifically designed for hair care, with the use of a lemon grass or mint shampoo being used thrice a week being particularly beneficial. More frequent use will prevent the hair from returning to its usual Ph balance, and can cause problems and deterioration of the hair. A solution made from lemon juice can be applied after washing which will work against the excessive production of sebum with the astringent properties of lemon juice.

 

If you suffer with dry hair, it is important to ensure your hair is hydrated, and a conditioner designed to provide moisture for dry hair is essential every time your hair is washed. A simple way to add moisture to your hair is to apply hot water to a towel, until it is wet, but not dripping, and then placing it on your head. It’s like a sauna just for your hair instead of the body.

 

Those who have problems with dandruff would be well advised to use a lotion combining mint leaves and vinegar. Not only does this help prevent dandruff from becoming a problem, but will also leave your hair looking both sleek and shiny. The examples mentioned here are just a few of the problems and solutions that can occur with your hair, but a little bit of research can help you find even more useful tips for your hair. 

How Water Makes You Irresistible

Have you ever thought about how important water is in your life? From the refreshing shower, to an invigorating swim in the sea, or the inviting waters of a lake, water is vital. The cooling raindrops on your face on a humid day, to letting the rain wash over your face and lips, smelling the scent released from the flowers and trees by the rain. The rain brings out our spirituality. After a strenuous run, is there anything better than a glass of fresh water?

 

10 Ways That Water Keeps You Gorgeous

 

• No other drink quenches your thirst like water.
• Water keeps your cells supple.

• The electrolytes in your body are balanced by water, energizing your body.
• Drinking water reduces your appetite.
• Staying hydrated keeps your brain active, and encourages a good mood.
• Your muscles recover better after a workout with a supply of water.
• An effect of drinking water is to keep your skin healthy.
• Water helps you lose fat by increasing your metabolism.
• Drinking water will help flush toxins produced by your body.
• Water keeps you healthy, and being healthy keeps you attractive!

 

3 Tips for Water Consumption

 

Tip 1: When thirsty, drink twice as much as quenches the thirst.

Tip 2: To avoid dehydration, drink regularly during the day.

Tip 3: Around eight glasses of water is recommended, or one glass per 20 pounds you weigh. For example: 7.5 cups would be recommended for a person weighing 150 pounds. Being active, or living in a dry climate will add to the amount of water you need.

 

Disclaimer: These are recommendations for people choosing a healthy lifestyle. Refer to your doctor before implementing a change in diet or exercise regime.

 

Water Facts

 

95% of your brain is water, and it will use up to 40% of the water you consume. Your blood contains 82% water, and your lungs are 90% water. Even a 2% drop in the supply of water to the body can cause dehydration, problems in identifying small text and issues such as short-term memory problems and difficulty in completing simple mathematics.

 

Although you can count caffeine-free tea and fruit juice in your fluid intake, alcohol or coffee are diuretics and promotes water loss. Sugar in the juice can also dehydrate the body, where fresh water doesn’t.

 

Daily Mantra

 

“Every drink of fresh water replenishes and revitalizes my life force.”

Recuperating After Botox Treatment

After Botox treatment, the recovery process is usually relatively straightforward. Since anesthesia isn’t used during the injection of Botox, there is no need to hold back a patient once the procedure is complete. There are minimal side effects, and when risks arise, preventative solutions are available. You will improve your chances of getting the results you want if you know how to recover properly from the treatment. 

 

1. Applying ice to the area around the injection for around 10 minutes after the procedure will help reduce and swelling or bruising from happening.

 

2. Have your concealer on hand if you have to go to work or to a social event, and apply to the area if you experience any redness around the treated skin.

 

3. Try not to apply pressure or massage the flesh around the injection, as this will spread the Botox which cause muscles not intended for treatment to be paralyzed. Gently wash your face, and if possible, sleep facing upwards.

 

4. Heavy activity after the treatment should be avoided for the first day after treatment, as the substance can move and affect an unintended part of your face unless you allow some recovery time.

 

5. Once you have received the treatment, ensure your head stays elevated for a few hours afterwards to prevent the substance from moving to different parts of the face.

 

6. Your doctor can give you a pamphlet and provide a demonstration of facial exercises which will help you test the dexterity of the facial muscles after the procedure.

 

7. You may also want to ask what products not to apply to your face after treatment, to try and avoid side effects and infection.

 

8. Keep in mind that the full recovery from the treatment can take up to ten days, so not having your desired results after 24 hours is not unusual, as Botox can affect different people in different ways.

 

9. Ensure you arrange an appointment after recovery with your doctor, as they will want to check that the dosage used has achieved the results you were looking for.

 

Should you or an acquaintance want to know more about Botox and your options, refer to a cosmetic surgeon who is board certified specializing in Botox treatments. They can supply the resources and information to help you decide which treatment to go after, and to get the results you want.

Why You Should Not Have a Facelift

If you needed any convincing that going for cosmetic surgery won’t always be an improvement, look at pictures of stars such as Joan Rivers. However, this isn’t always enough to prevent people from being tempted by the cosmetic improvements, and people are always sure that they would only have treatments that are necessary to stay young and beautiful.

 

If you needed any more reasons not to opt for a facelift, there are a number of reasons to go for surgery-free alternatives.

 

Other options are now highly effective alternatives to surgery.

 

Restoring a youthful visage shouldn’t be an overwhelming reason for a facelift, as technological developments have given us treatments which can provide similar results without a surgical visit. Why go under the knife?

 

The alternatives such as Thermage and Ultherapy are effective in skin tightening, and encouraging collagen growth, this can lift the skin in a way similar to a facelift. Both techniques are extremely safe and do not require surgery.

 

Although not individually enough to keep you from the surgeon, consider these other two reasons.

 

Surgery-free treatments are socially acceptable in most circles. 

 

News that a famous celebrity has chosen to undergo a facelift is no longer big news, but undergoing surgery for cosmetic purposes still has a stigma in many parts of the world. What may be the norm for the celebrities is not necessarily what is acceptable in all of society today.

 

It is one of human nature’s most instinctive responses to inspect and judge the results of cosmetic surgery once someone has had surgery. It is natural that many people will look and stare at those who have gone under the knife, and consider whether surgery was right for them.

 

The alternative treatments such as Thermage and Ultherapy don’t leave the marks that plastic surgery can, and will tighten and lift your skin so people notice the natural beauty, not the surgery.

 

People will ask about similar treatments, rather than gossiping about your surgery between themselves.

 

Non-surgical alternatives have less risks to your health and beauty. 

 

Many women can benefit from a facelift, but there are many cases annually of surgery errors which can cause scarring and deformation. Though not largely discussed, it is an unavoidable reality of cosmetic surgery.

 

With the possible consequences of surgery, perhaps sagging and wrinkles is not all bad, or even better, non-surgical alternatives could be the answer.

Common Mistakes in the Internet Home Businesses

 

Technology has become the theme of our day to day lives. It has extended into our home businesses with the invention of online businesses. As a matter of fact, 99% of home businesses are online businesses. This is why internet gurus have become very important members of the online home business sector. They are the main people who offer ideas and advice and especially when it comes to the businesses’ websites. All in all, there are still several mistakes that many make in this sector. Most of them make these mistakes unknowingly thinking that they are benefiting the business but in the real sense, they are actually killing the business. Here are the most common mistakes in relation to the internet home business sector. 

 

It is advisable to optimize your website but on the other hand, it is not good to over optimize the website. This is one very common mistake many internet home business entrepreneurs make in the course of initializing their businesses. This is very common among those that have just learnt about search engine optimization and want to do the same to their websites. Instead of doing this, why not share inbound links with other related websites. In addition to this, write as many articles as possible using the correct keywords and back-link your website. Also add your signature text containing you anchor text for better search popularity.

 

Another very common internet home business mistake that many make is to multiply websites immediately they initiate the business. Most of these individuals do this in a bid to imitate large scale companies and attract more clients hence higher returns. This is good but it tends to take up a lot of your time and efforts. Why not instead come up with multiple related web portals and exchange links with other related web portals. You will still get multiple returns.

 

The other common mistake is to register using the company’s domain. It is more advisable that you register your own domain. Once you use the company’s domain, then all the time, effort and money you used posting advertisements and classified ads will all be in vain once the company changes their referral code. Finally, joining get rich internet schemes is another common mistake that many make. Remember, when a deal is too good to be true, think twice. These schemes will just use up all your money. Hard work is a must, there is no such thing as free quick money! 

How to Assemble a Great Team for a Home Business

It is true that when you are working from home, you do not need to interact with people much, but then you cannot do without them either. After all, your clients are going to be human, even if you do not need to meet them personally. And, in any case, you will need people to work with you. Even if you plan on doing everything yourself at the outset, you will find that as your business begins to grow, you cannot helm a solo ship. You will need people to help you out with various aspects of your business.

 

When you are working online, the best benefit is that you can choose from la crème de la crème of professionals, and that too from all over the world. You are not restricted. If you know where to look, you can get the best people to work for you. All these people will work with you on a freelance basis. You will not need to sign any contracts with them. Just give them the work as it comes, and pay them when the task is accomplished. Most online professionals are quite happy to be working this way.

 

The place where you can find people is through online jobsites. Browse a bit. You will find that there are several such jobsites and they have people with different kinds of expertise. You get their details from the websites, and then you can contact them directly or via the website. You can ask them specific questions and find out whether they fit the bill or not.

 

There are also various freelancing jobsites that you can work through. Some of the popular freelancing websites are Freelancer.com, Scriptlance.com, Elance.com, Guru.com, and others. Find people having various kinds of interests and expertise here, and communicate with them directly. Here people will work through a bidding process. You post the details of the work you want, and then people will bid on that. They will also submit their resumes if you ask for them, and they will give you work samples. Then, you can choose from among these people. Since jobs are neatly categorized on these websites, it becomes easier for these professionals to find jobs they want to do, and it becomes easier for you to find someone you want to work with.

 

You are certainly not going to find everyone you want in one place. Keep trying out people with smaller assignments at first and then give them bigger responsibilities. When one person has settled into your business, you can look for additional people and keep growing your business.

 

That is how online home business experts grow their teams. It takes time. It could take a year for you to get a great team assembled, or even more. But, once you have a proper team working with you, it becomes quite easy to manage your work. Since they know your way of working and have a certain comfort level with you, they do not mind working with you. Your team is all set to take your business the way you want it to go.

Internationalizing Your Home Business—Things You Have to Keep in Mind

It is quite possible to take your little home business to global waters. The Internet is omnipresent on earth, so there is absolutely no reason why you should not expand your business to other untapped territories. If you do it well, you will be multiplying your home business immensely and that could bring in immense profits as well.

 

When internationalizing an online product, there are some things you have to keep in mind—things that can enhance your business prospects. Here is what you should do.

• Is there a demand for your business in the country that you are planning to take it to? Find that out first. All countries have different cultures, mindsets and likes and dislikes; so, it is important for you to find out about their local demands. Maybe you could make friends with people from that country on a social networking website like Facebook and find out more about them.

• Will you need to make a different version of your services to fit the local market? That becomes necessary most often when you are internationalizing a business. You have to play according to the country’s specific preferences. Maybe you will also have to change the packaging of your product; maybe even the brand name.

• Will your local advertising methods work there as well? You should know that people of different nationalities are attracted by different things. You will have to use strategies that they would like you to use.

• Another thing that you will absolutely have to do is to build a different website for that country. It would be great if you could create this website with their local language. Get a language expert from that country to do this, and tell them to use local colloquialisms. This really works.

• Next, get a local SEO team to get the website rank highly on the local search engine pages. Maybe even push the website on their local classified websites. All these things will help your website gain popularity in the local region.

 

You will find that this takes time, but if you do it well, your website could really promote your business well in the foreign country that you are targeting. When you are working from home, you should always look at options to take your website beyond obvious shores. Internationalizing a business works, and provides immense benefits, if done in the right manner.