5 Steps To Decide What To Do Next In Life

Are you feeling stuck in life and have no idea what to do next? Do you feel paralyzed with fear at the very mention of change?

 

First off, you should be proud of reaching this state. It’s a good thing because it means you sense that there are things that your life is shifting.

 

Yet, knowing where to begin or what to do can be overwhelming. So, if you’re facing this decision, then this post is for you.

 

Below are five steps to help you decide what to do next in your life.

 

1. Take a Step Back

 

When you’re looking at what to do next in life, it’s imperative to stop and take a step back. Take a look at the big picture to identify where you want to go and what you want to do.

 

Too often, we struggle with all the ways of how to get there without fully knowing where ‘there’ actually is. We don’t take the time to highlight what’s working in our lives and what’s not, so when we reach a crossroads, we feel baffled and unable to move forward.

 

This is when taking a step back can help you specify where you want to go as you move on in life.

 

2. Understand What Brings You Joy

 

Get to know what makes you, you. Dig deep and do some soul-searching to understand what motivates you.

 

Ask yourself these questions:

 

• What drives me and makes me excited?
• What are my values and beliefs?
• What contributions do I want to make to my community?
• What’s important to me?
• What are the skills and talents that I bring to the table?

 

3. Explore Your Passions

 

Make a list of all the things that you’re passionate about and explore those options in more detail.

 

It’s important to analyze your options both emotionally and intellectually. To do this, try to imagine how each one impacts your thought processes and your emotions.

 

Go through this step without worrying about any of the whys, should-haves, and would-nots. Instead, connect more with your subconscious to find out what resonates with you and your core values.

 

For instance, if you value innovation and technology, look for positions at industry-leading businesses. On the other hand, if you value family culture more, then you’ll be better off seeking a job at a small family-owned organization.

 

4. Learn New Skills

 

No matter how many great skills you already have, it’s always nice to learn something new. Whether it’s soft skills or hard, think about what you’d like to learn. Then, look for places in your community or online where you can take classes.

 

For example, you want to learn more about graphic design. You may consider applying to an art program.

 

Or you could be interested in gardening. You can take a class in gardening and plants, then apply for a job at a garden center or arboretum.

 

Whichever you decide to pursue, remember to set short-term goals that follow the SMART framework. This framework ensures that your goals are specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, and time-based.

 

5. Let Go of What Could Be

 

Change is scary because we don’t know what to expect from our decisions. This fear keeps you in a state of inaction and apprehension.

 

But if you could let go of all that worry just for a few minutes?

 

To do that, you need to trust yourself and maintain a positive mindset. Have faith that whatever comes along, you’ll find a way to handle it.

 

Stop thinking of change as something to be dreaded and feared. Instead, you can begin to think of it as something stimulating that adds a layer of excitement and intrigue to your life.

 

Remain to be open to whatever life brings your way. It may surprise you with an even better outcome than the one you had initially envisioned for yourself.

 

Final Thoughts

 

If you’re unsure what to do next in life, we hope these five steps can help you enhance your personal and professional life and improve your life in the long term.

 

It’s a tough journey, but if you’re determined to make it, it can also be extremely rewarding. Now, all that’s left to do is take that first step to discover your life purpose and find your passion in life.

Top 10 Tips To Better Understand Your Self-Defeating Habits

Self-defeating habits are those behaviors and thoughts that hold us back from achieving our goals and living our best lives. They are often automatic, unconscious, and counterproductive, and they can have a negative impact on our relationships, health, and well-being. In this article, we will discuss the top 10 tips to better understand your self-defeating habits and how to overcome them.

 

1. Identify what self-defeating habits you have

 

The first step to overcoming self-defeating habits is to identify them. Pay attention to the thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that are holding you back from achieving your goals. Do you procrastinate, self-sabotage, or engage in negative self-talk? If so, you might be acting as your own worst enemy. Once you have identified your self-defeating habits, you can begin to work on changing them.

 

2. Understand the underlying beliefs and emotions

 

Self-defeating habits often stem from underlying beliefs and emotions that we may not be aware of. In a study on golf participants, they found that those who spoke negatively of their ability and their game were more likely to perform worse than those who engaged in self-affirming language. 

 

For example, you may have a belief that you are not good enough or a fear of failure that is holding you back. It is important to understand these underlying beliefs and emotions so that you can challenge and change them.

 

3. Practice self-awareness

Self-awareness is key to overcoming self-defeating habits. How can you work against something that you don’t know exists, much less understand. Grab a pen and paper and take time to listen and record what’s going on in your mind. 

 

Pay attention to your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors throughout the day. Notice when you engage in self-defeating behaviors and what triggers them. This can help you to better understand your habits and begin to make changes.

 

4. Use mindfulness techniques

 

Mindfulness techniques such as meditation and deep breathing can help you to become more self-aware and present in the moment. When we auto-pilot with self-destructive tendencies, the results should not be surprising. 

 

Being present, staying in the moment, can give you far more information on why you do the things you do. Using mindfulness techniques can help you to break out of automatic, self-defeating patterns and make more conscious choices about your thoughts and behaviors.

 

5. Challenge your negative self-talk

 

Negative self-talk is a common self-defeating habit that can hold us back from achieving our goals. Pay attention to the messages you are giving yourself and challenge negative thoughts with evidence-based positive self-talk. 

 

For example, if you are telling yourself that you will never be successful, challenge that thought by reminding yourself of times when you have been successful in the past. Sometimes we struggle to pull up information to challenge these intrusive thoughts, if that’s the case, then set aside time to sit down and list out some accomplishments or positive experiences that you’ve had over the course of your life, so that you might have a better frame of reference moving forward. 

 

6. Set realistic goals

 

Setting unrealistic goals can lead to feelings of overwhelm and self-defeat. You want your goals to be challenging, but not impossible. It is important to set realistic goals that are achievable and aligned with your values and priorities. 

 

Break larger goals down into smaller, manageable steps and celebrate your progress along the way. As you begin to reach your smaller goals, you’ll develop more self-confidence in your abilities. This self-belief will go a long way in challenging self-defeating habits. 

 

7. Practice self-compassion

 

Self-compassion involves treating ourselves with kindness, care, and understanding, especially in times of difficulty or failure. It is important to practice self-compassion when working on overcoming self-defeating habits. 

 

These habits have a tendency to make us overly critical and pessimistic about ourselves. When are you the hardest on yourself? Acknowledge that change is a process and be gentle with yourself as you work towards your goals. 

 

8. Build a support network

 

Overcoming self-defeating habits can be challenging, and it can be helpful to seek support from others. Talk to friends, family, or a therapist about your struggles and ask for help and encouragement along the way. 

 

Having a positive network not only allows others to pour into you, but also you to encourage and support them. The act of helping others can often be a powerful way to notice pain points in our own lives. 

 

9. Replace self-defeating habits with positive behaviors

 

Replacing self-defeating habits with positive behaviors is a key step towards lasting change. For example, if you tend to procrastinate, set a timer for a short amount of time and work on a task for that amount of time. 

 

Then, take a break and reward yourself for your progress. This can help you to break out of the self-defeating habit of procrastination and replace it with a more productive behavior. If you can do this, behavior by behavior, then you’ll have a much larger chance at success. 

 

10. Practice self-reflection

 

Finally, practicing self-reflection is key to understanding your self-defeating habits and making lasting change. Take time regularly to reflect on your progress, successes, and challenges. Consider what is working for you and what you still need to work on. It’s recommended that you keep a journal. 

 

Along the way, make note of your highs and your lows. What habits did you see and what worked best in counteracting them? As you see patterns form, you can utilize them to your advantage. This can help you to stay motivated and committed to your goals.

 

Understanding your self-defeating habits is the best way to eliminate them from your path. Life hands us plenty of twists, turns, and even hurdles along the way, it’s important that we control what we can by encouraging our end of the bargain. 

 

If you incorporate these steps, you’ll have a much easier time understanding the active ways you might be sabotaging your own potential. Take them one day at a time. On the path to your aspirations, be your biggest fan!

 

4 Habits to Help You Focus Better

Focusing comes in different forms for everyone, some like to listen to music to help them focus, while others want complete silence. Keep reading for four tips that can help you find your focus.

 

1. Have a Daily Plan

 

You should wake up every morning with a plan of what your day will look like. This doesn’t have to be a detailed schedule that outlines every minute. But having a plan in place will eliminate small decisions that can get you off track. Having a plan will also give you a clear goal for how your day should progress and end. Take time every evening to write out (not just in your head) the plan for the next day. It can include what you will have for breakfast through what order you will complete your work in. It may also be helpful to prep items such as meals, coffee, and clothing to keep you on track.

 

2. Moment of Enjoyment

 

Every day take at least a small amount of time to do something you really enjoy. This can be peace and quiet over your coffee in the morning, a piece of candy in the afternoon, or snuggles with a pet or loved one in the evening. Having that moment of enjoyment will give you a respite from all the to-do’s that fill your day and give you time to reset and prepare for what comes next.

 

3. Be Persistent

 

If a task isn’t coming easily to you, feel free to walk away for a few minutes or even a day. But be persistent with the process and don’t give up. Allowing yourself to bounce from task to task to avoid the difficult work will leave you with a list of half-done tasks and a brain that is running in a million different directions.

 

4. Have a Day Off

 

“There’s no rest for the wicked and the righteous don’t need it” is a familiar turn of phrase that praises the busy. But we all know that it isn’t the truth. We all need a day off to rest, reset, and recuperate. We also need time with our families and friends to fill our cups and remind us why the hard days are worth it.

 

Focusing better is both a mindset and a physical act that you must prepare your mind and body for. Be sure that you are doing everything in your power to set yourself up to the best of your ability.

7 Fast Fixes to Help You Unwind When Overwhelmed

Sometimes it feels as though everything in the world is coming at you at once. Between work, relationships, kids, and a dozen other responsibilities, it’s no wonder it feels like there’s never time to unwind. The problem? If you never give yourself a break, you very quickly become overwhelmed. 

 

Ask a Question

 

When something new comes at you, the first question to ask yourself is a simple one: is this my problem? This might instead be an opportunity to set a boundary. You'll find much of your tension unwinding every time you say 'No.'

 

Bring Nature Indoors

 

Numerous studies have shown just a hint of fresh greenery or natural elements can create a calmer atmosphere. Try adding a plant, a collection of seashells, or a small Zen Garden or Buddha board to your space. Make a point of focusing on these elements when you’re feeling stressed to help you unwind.

 

Grab a Tune

 

Find a song on your playlist that always leaves you feeling calm and peaceful. Play it when you need a quick moment to unwind.

 

Try a Pleasing Scent

 

Aromatherapy has a lot of science behind it. Some smells are especially conducive toward easing anxiety. Just a sniff of bergamot, lavender, or frankincense will help you feel calmer almost immediately.

 

Step Outside

 

A short walk can build a lot of perspective and help you unwind even if you don't go far. Make sure to take some deep breaths of fresh air while you're out there.

 

Put on a Happy Face

 

When we smile, we change more than the shape of our faces. A smile quickly changes mood and even gives you a burst of endorphins in your brain, which are responsible for making us feel happy. The best part? A smile can help you unwind even if you're not feeling it initially. This is because even fake smiles tend to become real ones very quickly.

 

Set an Alarm

 

Sometimes, we need a reminder to adopt a change of attitude to unwind. Try setting the alarm on your phone several specific times every day. When one of the alarms goes off, either take a 'mindfulness moment' for a quick meditation or take a moment to read an affirmation. If you're strapped for time when the alarm goes off, use this moment to take a few deep breaths to give yourself a taste of unwinding before continuing with whatever you were doing.

 

While not every tip is going to work, be patient with yourself. Keep trying until you find the methods which give you the space to breathe. After all, unwinding is crucial to your mental health.

 

Focus on This When Change Is Out Of Your Control

Change equals difference. That's a basic definition, but it's truthfully what the change is. Something is different than it was before. This could be your job, a relationship, mother nature, or anything else. Where change is concerned, you come to grips with it before you've lived very long on this planet.

 

Almost all change is out of your control.

 

Even the most obsessively compulsive person who strives every minute of every day for control is taunted by this fact. Try as you may, your world will largely spin in any direction it wants. It doesn't stop and ask you what reality you'd like to experience.

 

You can try and influence it, and you might be successful in some ways. For instance, you can work really hard to get promoted. You go out of your way to find out what your boss needs from you, and then you make sure that happens. You outwork your coworkers, take extra courses that help you move up the corporate ladder, and nail a big promotion.

 

While patting yourself on the back for your hard work and how it paid off, remember one thing ... your boss or someone above him still had the final say in whether you got promoted or not.

 

That's pretty humbling when you think about it.

 

Take a look at any area of your life. You'll see that you don't always have as much influence as you previously thought you did. The best you can do is work on yourself, your relationships, and your environment to create a favorable reality.

 

Then when life steps in and throws some negative change in your face, remember to ask yourself this question.

 

"What Can I Control?"

 

Imagine that you are going for a walk. It's a beautiful day. The world has treated you to a spectacular experience with sunny skies, birds chirping, and stress-relieving nature all around you.

 

Then immediately in your pathway, a brick wall appears out of nowhere. It wasn't there, and then it was there. It's only a few feet wide, so you can easily walk around it. Instead, you repeatedly try to walk through it.

 

You can't control that this change has happened. What you can control is your response to it. Claim your sphere of control. Do what you can do, which is to move around the wall and continue your enjoyable walk.

 

Life will give you a lot of change you'd rather avoid. When this happens, don't waste a second of your time trying to influence something you have no control over. Determine what you can influence and what you can't. Then take action to turn something negative into the best possible outcome.

 

Focus on what you can control when you experience negative change. Trying to influence things that are blind to you is pointless. It wastes your time, cranks up your frustration, leads to anxiety and stress, and all of that can be avoided. You take away the power of negative change when you use your sphere of control to put it behind you as quickly as possible.

 

Never Look at a Failure As Final

Do you know anyone who seems to be bulletproof? You know, that friend of yours that takes failures in stride and is always smiling and moving forward in life. How do they do it? You know they're not immune to setbacks or hardship. They just seem to be able to bounce back quickly. Life's inevitable difficulties don't keep them from living the life they desire.

 

By the way, that person can be you. Mental resilience is something that can be developed. It's not a character trait you have to be born with. Every time you suffer some type of loss or failure, you have an opportunity to respond with resilience and emotional control.

 

If that seems impossible for you sometimes, here's what you need to start doing. Never look at a failure as the final result. Don't let some hardship or difficulty be the final chapter in your story. Or, as famous author F. Scott Fitzgerald said ...

 

"Never confuse a single defeat with a final defeat."

 

That is such a powerful reminder that your outlook is everything. The person with resilience chooses a positive outlook. They understand that negative things are going to happen in their life. Yet they don't allow that to be the end of their journey.

 

They don't embrace any single failure or loss as the final declaration of who they are.

 

Just Take One More Step

 

Resilience means persisting. You keep going. You push forward and see life's difficulties as nothing more than challenges. You can either become stronger and more capable or allow a defeat or failure to be a statement of who you are.

 

This can seem like simple advice, but the truth is, sometimes, the hardship we encounter in life can be truly debilitating. We simply don't see a way out. The worst of possible things has happened, and there's simply no way that we see any good coming from this.

 

When this happens, as it inevitably will in life, just take one step forward.

 

Don't worry about some big end result. You may be in a terrible situation. If you are, just make one positive movement. 

 

Have one positive thought. Move in the direction of a positive outcome. Even if it's miles away, don't worry about that end result. Just take the first step that moves you a little bit away from the difficulty you encountered.

 

Never let any single defeat be your final defeat. The instant you decide to relentlessly push forward, you show the world and yourself that you are a resilient human being. You won't be kept down for long because your unbreakable mental resolve won't allow you to be defined by defeat.

 

5 Ways to Experience Personal Growth even in an Upheaval

When you’re in upheaval, you tend to hit survival mode pretty quickly. Your life becomes focused on just getting through the day. Beyond that? You don’t have the time or energy to care.

 

Now more than ever, you need to take advantage of what time you have for personal growth. When we are challenged is where we rise to the occasion the best. During upheaval, our minds become busy, and we start thinking more. It’s a great time to take advantage of a mind made flexible by circumstances and learn something new.

 

In short, this is an excellent time for personal growth.

 

Furthermore, the act of bettering yourself gives you a focus, something you can control right now, at this moment, helping your mental state. It’s all about attitude and the idea you can keep growing, even now. How?

 

You Learn to Embrace Adversity

 

There’s no doubt upheaval can make a mess of your life. But as you dig in and start looking for solutions, you’re going to discover something about yourself. Adversity brings out your best, forcing you out from complacency to find new solutions. With an open-minded attitude, you can even come to embrace adversity.

 

You Become More Adept at Challenges

 

A crisis demands creative solutions. After all, if the status quo had been working, you wouldn’t be where you are now. In the long run, what this means if you’re going to get better at brainstorming and seeing solutions where you hadn’t previously.

 

You Become Better at Seeing the Opportunity

 

Once you look past the disaster itself, you’re going to start seeing a chance to shine. There’s a great deal of opportunity in upheaval if you can maintain an openness to trying new things and adaptability when it comes to rolling with the punches. Developing this skill now means you’re never going to miss an opportunity again.

 

You Cultivate Positivity

 

How can you possibly make it through a crisis if all you’re doing is focusing on the negative? If you can now discover the ability to find the positive and to keep an upbeat attitude even when things are going wrong, you’ll be able to stay positive no matter what life throws at you.

 

You Develop More Empathy

 

You can’t go through these kinds of tough times without learning something about how hard life can be. By leveraging this into empathy, you’ll gain more compassion for those around you. 

 

Wow, this is a lot! Imagine the newer, stronger version of yourself developing even now. How exciting to think you’ll be coming out of this crisis more robust and better than ever before!