Body Language Mistakes You Don’t Realize You Are Making

Learning to read others' body language is difficult, but learning to read your own is difficult too. 

 

It can become a problem because your body language is so important that it can affect your ability to get a job, keep it, and maintain friendships. Below are some of the common body language mistakes you might be making, as well as the impact they could have on your life. 

 

Crossing Your Legs

 

This one is more common if you are a woman, but men have been known to cross their legs as well. You may do it out of habit or even just comfort because you like to sit that way. The reality is, crossing your legs indicates to others that you are uncomfortable, or worse, if you cross at your ankles, it means you might be hiding something. Therefore, you should do your best to keep your legs uncrossed and your feet flat on the floor. 

 

Not Maintaining Eye Contact

 

It can be uncomfortable to maintain eye contact with someone. However, if you don't maintain eye contact, it can convey several different things, such as boredom, being distracted, or worse, that you are lying. Many interviewers and those looking to make business deals are huge on eye contact, so next time you talk with someone, be sure to maintain eye contact. 

 

Eye contact doesn't mean you should constantly stare, though. You should naturally break eye contact occasionally, but keep your eyes on their face or hands and don't let them drift around the room. 

 

Crossing Your Arms

 

Crossing your arms across your chest is very similar to crossing your legs, as you may be doing it out of habit or simply because you are cold. However, it will help if you put a stop to it because it can tell someone you are guarded, not open to new experiences, or that you feel you are above them. Try instead to keep your arms hanging neutral at your side or folded nicely in your lap. 

 

Don’t Lean in Too Much

 

When talking with someone, leaning forward can show that you are interested and let them feel they are important. Be careful not to lean in too much as this can lead the person to think that you want something from them. It can lead to feelings of hesitancy on their end and could ruin a business agreement. 

 

Overall, you likely didn't know you were making any of these body language mistakes. Now that you know, it's time to adjust so you'll never make these body language mistakes again. 

 

Body Language That Builds Trust

Did you know that body language is a big part of building trust? Even though someone may not realize it, they will subconsciously respond to your nonverbal cues and body language. Therefore, if you want to build trust with someone, you must exude the correct body language to achieve that goal. 

 

Keep reading to learn all about the best body language to use to build trust! 

 

Head Tilting

 

It may seem strange, but tilting your head when you speak to someone can help them trust you. A head tilt is a vulnerable position, making the other person feel you are listening and vulnerable to them. It will make them feel more comfortable with you than if you were to look at them straight on.

 

Please don't go overboard, though. That will only seem condescending. A little inch or two of a tilt is plenty! 

 

Keep Eye Contact

 

Maintaining eye contact is a sign of honesty. If you are talking with someone and moving your eyes all around, they may think you are lying. Instead, it would help if you kept your eyes focused on theirs when speaking.

 

Bare Your Palms

 

Another body language hack you may not be aware of is when you want someone to trust you, bare your palms. Baring your palms is a sign of peaceful intentions, and when you think about it, it makes sense as clenching your fists is a sign of anger or unrest. So if you want the individual across the table to trust you, definitely keep your palms relaxed and open as you gesture with your hands. 

 

Be a Mirror

 

Everyone uses and reads body language, even those who haven't been trained to look for it. Therefore, the best way to gain someone's trust is actually by returning their body language. It will give them a sense of familiarity. 

 

Copy both their posture and movements. If they are sitting with their back straight, you do the same. If they are using their hands to speak, you should too. It is especially useful for gaining trust in a formal setting like a business deal. 

 

Whether you realize it or not, body language is a huge part of gaining someone's trust. So next time you want to score a business deal or maybe make a new friend at the park, use the above body language tips to do so. You might be surprised by how quickly you can build trust! 

 

The Power of Body Language

The process of communicating non-verbally is the first thing that you typically notice when interacting with others. Body language has a way of relaying specific intentional or unintentional messages whenever there is interaction with others. We express ourselves through body language such as posture, eye contact, and gestures. Though the meaning of each varies from culture to culture, we read body language to convey thoughts, feelings, and intentions. 

 

Posture

 

In most cases, a person’s posture is one of the most important and first things that most people notice about another individual. This is because the way you hold yourself conveys specific messages to the people around you.

 

You can often demonstrate whether you are confident, shy, nervous, or apathetic by your posture. While standing tall, holding your shoulders back and your head held high can show that you are confident, standing with your shoulders slouched and head down can relay a message that you are not.

 

Whether you intend to convey specific messages, you tend to do so by how you carry yourself in front of others. The power of using your posture to show others the side of you that is strong, brave, and confident can go a long way to achieving your goals.

 

Eye Contact

 

Eye contact is another essential part of body language that demonstrates who you are as a person. Although maintaining eye contact may or may not be intentional, it can convey a specific message to others with whom you are interacting.

 

It can become an intense or awkward situation when you make eye contact with someone and hold it for an extended period. Whereas not making eye contact can make others think that you are not interested in what they are saying.

 

Although this can be somewhat confusing, it is vital to understand that maintaining eye contact does not necessarily mean staring someone down the entire time you talk to them. Instead, it is generally acceptable to hold eye contact in a more natural way that allows others to know that you are interested and not trying to intimidate them.

 

Gesture

 

Many people use hand gestures often as they communicate with others, whether they intend to or not. In most cases, this has become a habit that they picked up either from someone else or something they have done for an extended period.

 

It is important to remember that some gesturing is acceptable while others are not. Knowing the correct way and amount of gestures you should be using during a conversation can differentiate between a successful discussion and an unsuccessful one.

 

Many body language experts say that you should always try to convey that you are open and honest with the person you are speaking. It is essential to keep your palms open while facing the person and make sure you are demonstrating strength and confidence in what you are saying and the gestures you are using.

 

Overall, body language and other non-verbal communication have the power to convey messages that you may not be saying verbally. The way you hold your posture, make eye contact, and use gestures in your communication can demonstrate to others how you feel about what you are saying.

 

Watching Body Language to Tell If Someone Is Lying

Do you hate when people lie to you? You aren't alone. 

 

Lying isn't pleasant, and it would be great if everyone would tell the truth. Since we know this won't happen, it's important to learn to read the body language signs that someone may be lying. This way, you will know who you can trust and who you better keep at an arm’s length. 

 

Watch for Lip Biting

 

When some bites or folds their lip before telling you something, this is a clear sign that they are lying. However, it may not be an outright lie as it could mean they are also holding something back. For this reason, be sure to watch someone's lips when they are talking. 

 

Look for Fidgeting

 

Fidgeting can come in many forms, from leg bouncing to table tapping or even lip biting. Either way, fidgeting is a sign of nervousness that usually presents itself when someone is about to lie. However, be careful with this one as someone in an uncomfortable situation, like a job interview, may fidget from nervousness, not dishonesty. 

 

Observe Their Eyes

 

When someone is open and honest with you, their eyes will look straight into yours. But if they are being dishonest, you will notice their eyes moving around the room. It is especially prevalent when you ask a question and are waiting for an answer. So next time you ask a question, shift from watching the lips to watching the eyes. 

 

Evaluate Any Delays

 

Did you ask a question, and the individual left a big space before answering? This behavior is a red flag that the person is about to lie. This large pause is them getting their story together and likely deciding they will lie rather than tell the truth. Therefore, besides just watching their eyes and mouth, be sure you are also listening for the pause indicating a lie is coming. 

 

Crossing the Feet at the Ankles

 

Crossing your legs is a sign that you are uncomfortable if crossed at the knee. If they are crossed lower at the ankles, this is a sign that the individual is lying. If you are sitting with someone at a table, this can be hard to check without being obvious, but if you can take a peek without drawing attention to yourself, definitely check if they are crossing their feet.

 

Now that you know some of the most obvious signs that someone is lying, the next time you head into a conversation where you aren't sure about the honesty of the person you are talking to, be sure to watch their body language. This way, you will know whether or not they are lying to you. 

 

What is Body Language?

Have you ever been told you have terrible body language? This comment may have left you confused because you aren’t quite sure what body language is in the first place. Not to worry, keep reading to find out all about body language. 

 

Body Language is a Combination of Actions

 

Body language isn't as easy to explain as you may think. Body language isn't one thing. Rather, it is a combination of emotions, hand motions, and facial expressions that give away what you think or feel.

 

Not only are you expressing body language without knowing it, but you are also reading body language even if you don't realize you are. The human brain naturally begins to read certain aspects of body language from when you are young to increase self-preservation. 

 

Why Is Body Language Important?

 

Body language can help you with everything from getting a job to making new friends. 

 

For example, say you are at a party and notice someone standing alone in the corner. They have one arm hanging by their side, and the opposite hand is gripping the arm that is hanging. They are looking down at their feet and not making eye contact with anyone at the party.

 

This person hasn't said anything, but you already probably sensed that they were uncomfortable or shy. You got all this from just their body language. They didn't have to speak a single word. 

 

Body language is also important when it comes to raising children. When children are young, they can't always ask for what they want, meaning you'll have to read their body language to learn more about what they need. 

 

How to Read Body Language

 

You can take many classes to learn how to read body language, but you don't need to take one of these to get started. Rather you can start by simply taking the time to observe those around you. Even if it's something as simple as the party example above, you'll quickly discover how much you can learn about someone just from taking a moment to look at what their body language is telling you.

 

Overall, body language is a complicated combination of hand motions, expressions, and postures which helps give the mind clues as to how an individual may be thinking. Body language can help you more easily navigate life, so next time you see someone acting strange, take a moment and try reading what they aren't saying. 

 

Why Is It Important to Understand Body Language

You may not realize it, but body language is critical to your everyday life. Sound a bit strange? Please keep reading to find out why it is important to use body language in your daily life. 

 

It Helps You Get the Message

 

Sometimes, people aren't always saying what they mean. Other times, people may not mean what they say. This is where body language comes into play. Reading what someone isn't telling you can help you discern the real story and know whether or not you are being lied to. 

 

This knowledge can help you in situations where you may be in charge, such as when you are a parent or manager in a business. It can help you decide when an employee is truly late due to an accident or because they are a bad employee. 

 

What Isn't Said is More Important Than What Is

 

According to Science of People, verbal communication is only a fraction of what you mean when you say something. Therefore, if you only listen to what someone is saying and ignore their body language, you may miss the real point the

y are trying to make.

 

Today, it has become especially obvious how important body language is considering the invention of telephones and texts. It is very easy to miss someone's point or message when using these mediums because you can't read their body language. It can cause a misunderstanding that hurts someone's feelings, leading to an argument later. 

 

You’ll Be Able to Get Ahead in Life

 

Imagine if you could know that someone was thinking about stealing from you before they did so. It can be possible, thanks to the power of body language. Body language helps you predict the actions of others. It could save you the hassle of a bad business decision or hire. 

 

For example, say you are making a business deal with another company, but based on the CEO's body language, you notice his message is inconsistent. Avoiding this business deal could save you hassle and help your business get ahead rather than suffer a loss—all because you could read body language. 

 

In conclusion, it is important to understand body language for several different reasons. Not only can it help you more accurately understand the message someone is trying to convey, but it can also help you to understand the things people aren’t saying—allowing you to use these to your advantage to get ahead in life. 

 

3 Body Language Techniques You Should Be Using

Meeting new people is often a part of everyday life, especially if you are working or are in public regularly. Many people feel nervous or anxious when speaking in public, during interviews, or just conversing with others. It's imperative to find ways to manage your anxiety in these situations if you want to make it through with confidence. Here are three body language techniques that you should be implementing daily.

 

1. Embrace an Open Posture

 

It would be best if you conveyed a confident body posture when communicating with others. You can do this by ensuring that you are standing up straight but not rigid or too relaxed. Your hands should be by your sides instead of on your hips or crossed in front of you. This is because you must show others that you are open to the conversation about to take place.

 

Often, people can misinterpret what you are trying to convey through the body language you show. Many body postures can tell others that you are either close-minded, controlling, or you do not care about the conversation at all.

 

2. Focus on Maintaining Eye Contact

 

Most people know that keeping eye contact with the person you are talking to is essential to the conversation. Whether you are having a casual conversation with a friend or colleague or during a job interview, it is true. Maintaining eye contact shows the other person that you listen and are open to what they say.

 

A caveat to this technique is a balance between maintaining eye contact and staring a person down. Too much staring can make the discussion awkward and tell the other person that you are trying to control the conversation.

 

3. Use Appropriate Hand Gestures

 

Using hand gestures when conversing with others can communicate either a sense of confidence or nervousness, depending on how you use them. While hand gestures seem to come naturally to many people, others are not adept at using them.

 

It is essential to have a firm handshake that conveys confidence instead of awkwardness. The handshake upon initial meeting can tell a person quite a lot about the other person by the firmness and how long the handshake goes on. Additionally, using gestures throughout the discussion can show others that you are into what you are saying and that you are confident. However, be sure to choose your hand gestures carefully, or you can defeat the purpose of using them.

 

Overall, using these three techniques can help you have more confidence when speaking either in public or with other people during casual conversation or in more professional settings. It is crucial to remember that presenting yourself non-verbally is just as important as what you say.

 

Body Language For Confident Speaking

It’s not just about the words that come out of your mouth. The body language that you use goes a long way towards making you a more confident speaker. Some people think that body language is only something that you should pay attention to when you are speaking in public but this is not the case.

 

The Importance of the right Eye Contact

 

Making and maintaining the right eye contact is important in all speaking situations where you can see the person or people that you are speaking to. If you do not make the right eye contact then the words that come out of your mouth can be largely irrelevant. Have you ever had a conversation with a person that didn’t make eye contact? It is not a pleasant experience.

 

You need to ensure that you only make eye contact with someone for a certain amount of time. If you do this for too long it will seem like you are staring at them and they will not be comfortable with this. With one-on-one conversation the limit for eye contact is around 9 seconds according to scientific research.

 

One of the benefits of making good eye contact is that you can gauge the mood of the other person or people. If they seem bored with your speaking then you can change your approach to get them back onside. 

 

Use the Correct Hand Gestures

 

What is the link between hand gestures and confident speaking? When you use the right hand gestures you can provide the necessary emphasis to what you are saying. It is a good way to amplify particular points that you are trying to make for example. 

 

Making the right hand gestures will also help you to be perceived as more believable and genuine. Be careful not to overdo it with hand gestures though. Some speakers use so many hand gestures when they are speaking that their audience becomes more focused on the movement of their hands than what they are saying.

 

Facial Expressions are important

 

A facial expression will be used by another person to predict your mood. They are also useful to identify intent and emotions. Using the right facial expression will help your audience to really understand the message that you are delivering.

 

An example of this is to smile at an appropriate time. Getting your fascial expressions right will take a bit of practice and you need to do this. The use of the right facial expressions will give you more confidence when you are speaking.

 

Identify and eliminate bad mannerisms

 

There are a number of bad mannerisms that will not help you in your quest to become a confident speaker. We all have bad habits that we have strengthened over the years and you can end up using a bad mannerism when you are speaking without even realizing it.

 

A classic example of this is to keep saying the same words over and over. Some people use the word “like” a lot when they are speaking and others will succumb to those “ums” and “ahs” which can be so annoying for an audience.

 

The best way for you to identify if you have any bad mannerisms that will affect your speaking is to record yourself. You can then play back your performance and look for things that you are not happy about. It can take a lot of effort to eliminate a bad mannerism but it is important to do this.

 

Confident Speaking Through Voice Inflection

You may not be aware that you can speak more confidently simply by changing the inflections that you use with your voice. It will probably take you a while to practice this until you get it right but it will certainly help. Using different voice inflections will make your audience believe that you are a confident speaker.

 

We have some good news for you here. It is not necessary for you to change your voice completely to use the right inflections. Only small changes are required to your normal speaking voice to make you sound a lot more confident to those that are listening to you.

 

Use your Diaphragm to Speak

 

The most successful speakers use their diaphragm to speak. They do this because breathing using the diaphragm puts them in more of a relaxed state. It is easy to learn to breathe using your diaphragm and then you can start to speak from it as well.

 

A Smile will change your Voice Inflection

 

When you smile during speaking you are naturally going to change the inflection in your voice. We are not suggesting that you smile throughout your speech as this can be perceived as being insincere. Just smile at the right time to make the voice inflection change.

 

You only need to smile a little to change your voice inflection. When you get this right people will be able to hear you smiling which sounds odd but it is true. The act of a little bit of smiling when you are speaking will make your voice sound a lot more friendly. It is a great way to put your audience at ease.

 

Smiling when you are speaking will also give you a great confidence boost.

 

Practice Enunciating your Words

 

You want to avoid mumbling when you are speaking as this does not sound confident at all. In order to get your message across to others it is important that you enunciate your words. Mumbling your words can make you feel insecure about your speech and your audience will certainly pick up on this.

 

One effective way to enunciate your words is to place a wine cork between your teeth. With the wine cork in place you need to read something out loud. We recommend that you record this. Now remove the cork from your mouth and read the same message out loud again. You should notice a big difference in your enunciation.

 

Find your Natural Voice Pitch

 

If you can speak using your natural pitch then you will be the most confident. First, you will need to identify your natural pitch. An effective way to do this is to close your mouth and then let your lower jaw drop. Make sure that your lips remain closed together.

 

Next you want to make a humming sound beginning with a high pitch and then working your way down to the lowest pitch. As you do this, use your fingers to feel the vibrations on your lips. The strongest vibrations will come when you are humming at your natural pitch.

 

Lower your Voice for more Confidence

 

There have been a number of scientific studies that show lowering your voice slightly can make you sound more confident. The reason for this is that people tend to respond more favorably to people that have a deeper voice. 

 

Increase Confidence Using The Power Of The Pause

Successful speakers know about the power of the pause. You can use pauses with your speaking in any situation. It works well for one-on-one situations as well as for public speaking in front of an audience. 

 

We encourage you to master the power of the pause. Knowing when to use the pause and how long to do this will help to increase your confidence as a speaker. Here are some of the main reasons why you need to use the power of the pause:

 

It will give your Confidence a Boost

 

By taking a short pause at the right time when you are speaking this will help you to feel more comfortable and in control of your delivery. There are people that never seem to take a breath when they are speaking and they do not tend to be confident speakers.

 

Rushing what you want to say is not going to have a good impact with your audience. In fact, speaking in a rushed way can really irritate people. By taking appropriate pauses you will come across as much more confident and relaxed.

 

Control your Body with Pauses

 

Nerves can build up when you are speaking and when you take an appropriate pause for breath you will be able to calm these nerves. It is essential that you are in control of your emotions when you speak and that you do not feel anxious or tense. With a pause you can take back control and alleviate negative problems.

 

Being anxious or tense is very likely to deflect your focus. You are going to concentrate more on the pain of the tenseness rather than your delivery. Practice your speaking and record this. Use the recordings to identify the best times to use pauses.

 

Using a Pause can add Energy

 

When you pause at the right time you will be able to take a deep breath which will help to restore energy in your body. This additional energy actually transfers to your speech and can make it a lot more powerful. 

 

You have just made a powerful statement and you want your audience to fully take this on board. What do you do? Take a pause just after delivering the statement. This can add a lot more excitement to your statement for your audience.

 

Use Pauses to Increase Engagement

 

Engaging with your audience is very important and using pauses at the right time can help to increase engagement. Nobody wants to listen to a speaker that just rambles on and never seems to take a pause. This is a surefire way to disengagement with an audience.

 

If you sense disengagement creeping in with your audience then you can use a short pause to address this. Pausing even for a short time will help you to think and make changes to your approach. Audiences will appreciate you doing this and perceive you as a confident speaker.

 

Questions are a good way to increase engagement with your audience. When you ask a question, you need to pause for a short time to enable them to answer. Your audience needs time to reflect on what you tell them and pausing at the right time will help them to do that.