Sunday, 10 April 2022

Pivotal Life Decision: How You Treat Your Body


The Top 4 Ways To Care For Your Physical Health

 

Often, you will hear stories from athletes or movie stars of a pivotal moment in their life which led them to stardom. Meaning, a crucial change of high significance led them down their life path. Perhaps it was the man who weighed over 300 pounds and suffered a heart attack at a young age. He now is a weight trainer at the local gym. His pivotal moment was when he thought he might not live. 

 

In the United States alone, the U.S. Department of Labor recently reported, “The median number of years that wage and salary workers had been with their current employer was 4.1 years in January 2020.” 

 

That averages out to between 10-12 jobs per working lifetime (16-65 years). Looking back on all the career paths you have taken; it often was due to a pivotal moment to change your job, either physically or mentally. 

 

When our minds are full of anxiety due to the “whirlpool” of life, we often ignore the signs that our bodies always need nutrition and care as well. 

 

The following four practices will get you on the right path so you can make a well thought out pivotal decision:

 

Put your body on a sleep schedule – When we are in the midst of making a big life decision, our sleep is often the first thing to be affected. Multiple research studies have shown the average adult should sleep anywhere from seven to nine hours per night. 

 

Yet, one of the biggest complaints of most individuals claimed that they rarely got more than 4-6 hours per night of good sleep. On the other side of the spectrum, if oversleeping seems to be taking over your life, more than nine hours per night, this can lead to heart disease, depression, and diabetes.

 

If you find that your phone is often checked when you cannot sleep, try plugging it in on the other side of the room. Instead of distracting yourself with electronics, pick up an old book you have wanted to start. 

 

If you need more stimulation, use a deck of cards to play solitaire. Use this quiet time to wind down from the day and prepare you for better sleep. Lastly, set your alarm clock to the same time every day, including weekends. This will condition your body and mind to run on a more even schedule. 

 

Keep your body hydrated inside and out – While it is always recommended to keep your body hydrated on the inside, it is just as important to care for your skin. A recent study conducted by the Journal of the American Academy of Dermatology concluded, “Few adults regularly used sunscreen on the face. Men reported a low 18.1 percent and women showing at 42.6 percent.” The study goes on to say, “If used properly, regular sunscreen use can reduce risk for skin cancer and prevent or delay photoaging of the skin.”

 

Try keeping a bottle of sunscreen in areas you frequent. One for the bathroom, one for bedroom, one for the car. Get in the habit of putting it on when you are in that room or vehicle. Make sure to put sunscreen on any areas that are exposed to the elements, even during cloudy days. 

 

Provide your body with good nutrition – Along with drinking plenty of water throughout the day, it is just as crucial to eat healthy food. With the stress of each day and the idea of cooking dinner seems unattainable, this is the best time to reach for hearty and substantial options. 

 

If chips and candy are a comfort food for you during times of high anxiety, try thinking of those foods as a reward. Salty and sweet food is the craving, not the food itself. Instead, keep baby carrots and a low-calorie dressing for a healthy alternative when wanting something sweet. If looking to satisfy a salt craving, prepare a bag of popcorn. 

 

According to the American Heart Association, “When popcorn is air-popped and lightly seasoned, popcorn is an efficiently healthy snack.”

 

Make your teeth a priority – Recently, the Center for Disease Control (CDC) collectively reported that, “While almost 70 percent of adults polled (18-45 years), claimed to be brushing twice a day, a staggering 25.9 percent reported untreated dental cares.” 

 

With extra anxiety and daily schedules, brushing teeth twice a day is not even on the radar.

 

In lieu of trying to remember to do this “chore,” give yourself a visual reminder. Put a picture of a funny tooth on the bathroom mirror. If you prefer to shower in the morning, take the toothbrush and paste with you. This eliminates the idea of too many tasks.

 

In Closing 

 

By taking better care of your body during a pivotal moment in your life, the mind can work through all the emotions and decisions more clearly. As American author Jim Rohn once said, “Treat your body like a temple not a toolshed. The mind and body work together…If you take good care of it, your body can take you wherever you want to go, with power and strength and energy and vitality to get you there.”

 


Pivotal Life Decision: Removing Toxic People


Toxic people masquerade as a friend or loved one, but in reality, are unkind or harmful to you. Unfortunately, everyone can probably recall at least one toxic person they’ve encountered at some point in life. 

 

Navigating relationships with toxic people is tricky business. For example, sometimes a toxic person is someone related to you or someone you’ve known for a very long time. In these situations, deciding whether or not to remove the toxic person from your life is pivotal life decision. 

 

How can I identify a toxic person?

 

No two toxic people are exactly the same. However, there are some similar traits among toxic people that can help you identify whether or not they’re harming you more than helping or supporting you. 

 

WebMD provides a list of general characteristics you can use to spot a toxic person:

 

   The person is manipulative; they may try pressuring you into doing things you don’t want to do

   The person leads you into situations that feel reckless or dangerous

   The person owes you an apology, but it never happens

   The person puts you down or makes you feel bad about yourself 

   The person needs a lot of your time and attention

   The person’s behaviors are usually inconsistent or unpredictable 

   The person will test (and often break) your personal boundaries

   The person may abuse substances such as drugs or alcohol

 

If any of these traits align with someone you suspect is a toxic person, it may be time to examine your relationship with them to see if they’re causing issues in your life. 

 

What are some effects of allowing a toxic person to remain in my life?

 

Trying to maintain a relationship with a toxic person is nearly impossible. You may feel like you can keep the relationship going, but usually, the negative traits of the toxic person outweighs any of the good they may have. 

 

Allowing a toxic person to remain in your life can harbor a ton of negative effects, including:

 

   Damage to your self-confidence 

   Damage to relationships you have with other people

   Increased stress and anxiety 

   Constant feelings of guilt or uncertainty 

   Lack of trust within the relationship

   Increased involvement in drama 

 

What are some strategies for removing a toxic person from my life?

 

Deciding to remove a toxic person from your life is pivotal. Take some time to have an honest look at your relationship. Whether you determine that you need to change your relationship with the toxic person or remove them from your life altogether, it’s important to approach the situation in a way that keeps you protected. 

 

In an extreme situation where your safety is at risk, consider the following:

 

   Ghosting them (Note: this strategy should only be used in extreme cases where you are being mentally or physically abused. “Ghosting,” or disappearing from someone’s life completely with no notice or information, allows you to leave a person without any details. If your toxic person is abusing you, this is a method that will break off the relationship without giving them a chance to harm you again or know where you’ve gone, protecting your privacy and safety.)

 

In other situations where the person is toxic but not an immediate threat to your physical safety or wellbeing, consider the following:

 

   Having an honest, open conversation with them that sticks to the facts of the relationship. Explain to them why they’re hurting you and why the relationship needs to change or end. 

 

A toxic person may try to sway your decision with lies, deception, or displays of emotions, but during these conversations, it’s vital to stick to the facts and not allow yourself to be manipulated by them anymore. 

 


Pivotal Life Decision: How You Treat Yourself


The Top 4 Practices You Can Begin Today

 

With busy work schedules and family time, personal time often goes to the back burner. While this might be okay on a short-term basis, if self-care is not achieved, the only one who suffers is you. 

 

According to the National Library of Medicine, “As of 2019, Americans 25 years of age and older, 6.6 percent engaged in health-related self-care each day. Among that reporting self-care, almost 80 percent only used 90 minutes to relax; 20.6 percent reported 2 hours or more.” 

 

Self-care is not only about bubble baths and short vacations. This is about taking the time you need to give back to yourself as a person. 

 

Let us look at the top four ways that you can start today to begin treating yourself:

 

Compliment yourself – We often are our own worst critic. In fact, a recent study conducted by Weight Watchers, “Women were found to criticize themselves at least eight times a day. In a survey of 2,000 women, one in seven participants admitted to criticizing or berating themselves regularly each day.”

 

Give yourself a short-term task to complete, such as cleaning out the car. Now, compliment your behavior. “Cleaning the car was a hard job, but I’m proud I took care of this chore.” Acknowledge the feeling of compliments and continue to do this throughout your day. By being kinder to yourself, your demeanor towards others will be more inviting and calmer.

Find your passion in hobbies – By engaging in activities that bring personal achievements, is not only good for your body but your mind. Many people have multiple hobbies ranging from outdoor activities to quiet times. 


According to a study conducted by Target Market Research, “In general, 74 percent of overall respondents consider having hobbies to be important. However, 66 percent agree that they can also be time consuming. And 66 percent said that they wish they had more time for hobbies in their lives.” 


Choose a hobby for indoors and one for outdoors. Maybe you will commit to a twenty-minute walk everyday around your neighborhood. For indoor hobbies, choose one that allows for personal time as opposed to group activities, such as sewing or building bird houses. 


Allow yourself to make mistakes – While striving for perfection in almost everything we do; we often overlook how it is affecting us as an individual. Each mistake is taken as a step back as opposed to a learning experience. 

 

Emotions, physical tension, and exhaustion find their way to the top of our proverbial life rope. As children we learn from our mistakes and keep learning, yet, as adults, we discount this.

 

The next time you are presented with an important task, allow yourself to take it one step at a time. Use the pro and con method. Write down the good things that could happen if you choose one way and what could be the downfall. This is how you learn.

Ask for help – Everything we learn comes from someone else’s experiences. Though it might seem easier to do things on your own, this often leads to resentment and burnout. 

 

A newly released study conducted by Civil Science LLC showed, “As it turns out, 74 percent of US adults do ask for help. That is an overwhelming majority, and a great sign, especially in an age and a society that prioritizes self-reliance.”

 

The next time you are faced with a large project, try dividing up with tasks to others that can contribute. If it is cleaning up the yard, ask friends to join you and reward them with a home cooked meal and good conversation. 

 

In Conclusion 

 

Making a pivotal change to treat yourself better is a road that seems unattainable but, in the end, the reward is worth the fight. As famed musician Aaron Bell once quoted, “When you treat yourself special, you bring out the best in yourself.”



Pivotal Life Decision: Your Choice Of Partner


When was the last time you considered how pivotal it is to choose your life partner? What is the best way to choose the appropriate partner? Because this is such a significant problem for most of us, we don't give it much thought. It isn't very comforting. 

 

According to WebMD"There are many good reasons to choose wisely and carefully when picking a spouse -- not the least of which is that you'll be spending an awful lot of time with them in both the near and distant future, possibly even raising children together." 

 

However, the fact is that you have complete choice over who you choose as your life mate. And you must realize that the decision you make is really important!

 

Everyone is a swipe away from approval or disapproval in the initial stages in today's dating market. It's crucial to remember, though, that your possible life partner is much more than just "the winning horse" in a race you've chosen to wager on. 

 

If you want to marry the proper guy or lady, you must make a well-considered decision; it cannot be done with a sweep of the finger. 

 

Here are five indicators that might help you figure out if someone has what it takes to go the length.

 

When It Comes To Selecting A Lifemate, Talking About Money Is Crucial

 

A couple's decision to plan a life includes focusing on wealth production, expansion, and protection. Two people may have very multiple viewpoints on what it costs to build a bank account and income stream in good shape. 

 

Finding the ideal marital partner also entails determining if you and your partner have similar spending and saving habits, as well as how you may protect yourself against financial infidelity.

 

When Searching For A Life Partner, Consider Your Parental Aspirations

 

The pinnacle of a couple's life is the birth of a new-born. When searching for a life partner, it is vital to discuss "whether one wants children," "how many children," and "when is the ideal time to have children." 

 

As you embark on your long journey as a parent with your life partner, you will undoubtedly make some parenting mistakes, but you must also choose whether you can fix yourself and move on, or you may wind up arguing over minor issues.

 

How Your Partner Handles Anger Is Pivotal

 

Rather than asking, you should observe. Keep an eye on how they act when they don't get their way, when they're disappointed, or when they're furious. 

 

We must deal with not getting our way in life, as well as pain and regret. How individuals conduct themselves around others in these situations reveals how they will act with you in the future.

 

Consider How Generous Your Life Partner Is

 

Considering generous treatment and healthy relationships with others is regarded as the No. 1 element to a healthy relationship (according to long-term research at the University of Virginia), it's critical to observe how generous your possible spouse is in their treatment and discussion of others. 

 

We are all giving and loving while we are in love, but you need to watch for signs of how generous someone will be once the infatuation love portion wears off.

 

Discuss What Love Means

 

According to LifeHack"True, genuine love begins after the spell wears out, after the honeymoon ends and real life begins. This is great news! If we know that actually loving someone starts at the end of the buckling knees, then we're prepared; we don't give up. We don't think, "Oh, no, it's over! My heart doesn't flutter anymore, and the butterflies? What butterflies?"

 

For love to grow, it has to be supplemented by respect between both partners. When you're looking for the ideal life partner for marriage, be sure they respect you as much as they love you.

 


Pivotal Life Decision: Whether You Plan Your Life Or Let The Universe Take You Where It Will


Are you a planner, or are you the type of person who just goes with the flow? There may be benefits to both, and chances are, your personality will determine your answer. Some of us naturally enjoy planning, whether it involves a series of spreadsheets and a strict calendar or not. While others are more comfortable with spontaneity. There is one problem with the latter, often when we go with the flow we don't feel as in control of life as we could and that could be the root of a lot of stress. 

 

By planning, you are living life intentionally and taking the wheel. It's going to help you feel more confident and calm no matter what life throws your way. If you allow the universe to guide you, you run the risk of missing out. 

 

You might not pick up on signs meant to direct you, you might take the wrong idea from a message, or have to learn an awful lesson before you understand. Then again, you can experience those same things even if you plan down to the second of your day. 

 

Whether you plan your life or let the universe take you where it will, there are a few tips that will help you ensure your life remains on the path you wish to walk. 

 

1.     Does It Bring Joy?

 

No matter which way you go, joy should be your GPS. When you find yourself experiencing true joy it's a pretty good indication you are doing the right things and that you're on the right track. If you aren't doing the right things, if you're not doing what you should be doing then you're likely to feel deeply unhappy or dissatisfied. 

 

If you're unhappy with a specific area of your life it could be because you've veered off course or the universe might just be telling you to take a chance. If you hate your job, maybe you need to leave it or simply approach it differently. Pay attention to your moments of joy and your moments of pain to get a better understanding of what it's trying to tell you. 

 

2.     Pain

 

Physical pain with no particular cause (such as arthritis, strain from physical activity, etc.) might be a sign that something else is going on. That's the type of thing you can put down to the universe, but it's something to pay attention to even if you're a planner. 


Stress can create inflammation and inflammation can cause pain so paying attention to your body is important. You can choose to address it and face it head-on or you can grin and bear it and potentially make matters worse (either through self-medication or missing out on an underlying condition). 

 

3.     It's In Your Head


If you can't get something out of your head then someone somewhere is trying to tell you something, whether it's the universe or your inner voice. It's when your subconscious keeps forcing the same dream about work trying to force your hand to make positive changes. 


It's the song that gets stuck in your head that has a deeper message if you would just pay attention. If you can't get it out of your head then you need to start listening to the message.

 

4.     Inner Voice 


Your inner voice or your intuition is a valuable resource, whether you choose to allow the universe to guide you or you sit down and plan your week meticulously. It's the canary in the coalmine. Your inner voice will let you know when things aren't right. If you struggle to hear yours, meditation can help. 

 


Pivotal Life Decision: Whether You Treat Life As Short And Precious Or Take It For Granted


Whether you plan extensively or not, life will always throw you curveballs. You can never know for sure where you will end up. You can never know for sure what you will or won't accomplish. You'll be surprised by the friends you make, the relationships you build, the experiences you have, and the emotions you feel. Life is a mix of happiness, sadness, memorable moments, and dull seconds ticking by. 

 

People bring you total joy and they can also cause immense pain. Friendships will come and go, romances will come and go, even family members might fade into the background. You might hop from job to job or stay with one company your entire career. 

 

You might have a bank account to make everyone jealous or you could go bankrupt and lose your reputation. Life will always fluctuate. It won't always be one-way traffic and if it was, how would you learn to savor the best bits?

 

You have to make a decision. Will you treat life as short and precious? Or will you ignore the magic and take it for granted? 

 

To fully enjoy everything that life has to offer you need to also understand how fleeting life is, death is inevitable. We live as though we know how long we have left, but we don't know. You can look at the life expectancy where you live and think see, I have at least this long to get it right! 

 

Anything can happen in life, an innocent trip can result in a fatal blow to your head as you fall. You might be a responsible driver, but not everyone on the road is. Terminal illnesses can come to people of all ages. I don't say this to depress you, rather, I say this to remind you how precious life is. 

 

Time is our most valuable resource, but so many of us waste it. Instead of daydreaming do something to make those daydreams your reality. Every day should be a fight to lead the life you most want to live. Right now, you live in fear of failing because you're obsessed with worry over the potential consequences.

 

If you died tomorrow, what would failure look like to you? What would regret mean? If you had 24 hours left to live, what would you do with your remaining time? What do you care about? 

 

You might realize just how much of your time was spent doing things you don't particularly care about. Or perhaps you did things that you thought would help you build to something, but now all that's gone and you realize you weren't really building to anything anyway you were just biding your time. 

 

We'd all likely do a bit more living if we knew our expiration date. We'd laugh louder, love harder, dance, sing, and indulge the little things we always put off for work. I want you to think about that each morning, I want you to think about how you would live this day if you knew it was your last.

 

I know you can't quit your job and drain your savings to road-trip across the country. You can make that phone call, send that text, and meet up with someone though. 

 

All of the external expectations we carry, all of our fear of failure, and pride fall away when death comes knocking. In death, only the most important things remain. Nobody wants to die, but we all will, the question is how you are going to use the time you have. Don't busy yourself living for others when your time is so limited. 



Signs You Struggle With Making Decisions


Director of the creativity for resilience program at Dell Medical School Carrie Barron M.D. suggests that people who struggle making decisions may be suffering from a variety of mental health issues. These can include depression, anxiety, and fear of failure. (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-creativity-cure/201408/why-is-it-difficult-make-decisions#:~:text=Having%20difficulty%20making%20decisions%20can%20be%20a%20sign,sentiments%20of%20the%20person%20reaching%20out%20were%20real.).

 

Indecision regarding things such as what to wear or what to eat may not be major issues but a failure to make important choices can be a problem. This can lead to problems in our careers and personal lives leaving us missing out on important things. 

 

Being a Perfectionist

 

Psychologist Ellen Hendriksen, Ph.D. suggests that one of the signs that someone may be a perfectionist is an inability to make decisions. It may seem unlikely because you would imagine a perfectionist is very organized and would find decisions easy and for some they are. But there are some perfectionists for whom it is actually the opposite. 

 

A fear of making mistakes and being less than perfect can actually make perfectionists shy away from making choices. (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/how-be-yourself/201911/nine-little-known-signs-perfectionism).

 

Those perfectionists who struggle with decisions often find themselves overwhelmed by their options. They do not want to get the wrong food for a party or choose the wrong outfit. It can actually take them a long time to make simple decisions. 

 

Overthinking

 

Some people will plan and replan an event thinking of every eventuality. They overthink things almost to death and often end up being stressed out as a result. As a result of overthinking and over planning, they often struggle to settle on a decision.

Critical thought is important to good decision making which means overthinking tends to cloud that. It may be a tiny detail of something that holds up a bigger decision. 

 

Being a People Pleaser

 

Psychotherapist Amy Morin suggests that people pleasers hope by saying yes to everything it will make them feel accepted and liked. This means they have certain traits that make it difficult to make their own decisions. 

 

In an effort to please others they will make decisions they feel will make people like them. These are often not choices that are good for them. (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/what-mentally-strong-people-dont-do/201708/10-signs-youre-people-pleaser).

 

Rather than spending time on themselves doing what is best for them personally, people pleasers fill their time with other people's concerns. 

 

Low Level Jobs

 

Someone who is uncomfortable making choices will often reflect this in their choice of career. They may prefer jobs with well-defined parameters with little to no scope for initiative. Their mentality is to go to work, do the job they know and then go home again. They may well be hard workers and have been offered promotions but have turned them down.

 

The responsibility of making important decisions will make someone who does not like doing so avoid management level jobs. They struggle to make decisions in their own lives let alone decisions that affect others. 

 

Lack of Self Confidence

 

It takes a certain amount of confidence to boldly make important life decisions and this is something people with low self-esteem may struggle with. Someone who has little self-confidence may struggle to make simple choices such as what to wear based on a negative self-image. They may feel they do not look good in any clothes so it becomes a struggle.

 

A lack of confidence in yourself will likely lead to an inability to trust your own decisions. You don’t think you are able to make a good choice about things so you may avoid having to decide entirely. 

 

Final Thoughts

 

Decision making can be very difficult for those with little faith in their own abilities. They often prefer to let others make the important choices.