You Can Communicate Your Feelings Without Upsetting Others—Here’s How

Have you ever held back on saying something because you didn’t want to upset someone? There’s always a point where you internally debate whether or not to open up or say something, and it’s vital that you take that moment to decide to go forth and communicate. It’s not about avoiding upsetting people but rather about being confident in yourself and your feelings. You’re allowed to feel a certain way, and in order to communicate those feelings, start with these X tips. 

 

1. Understand Yourself Fully First

 

If you start a conversation off with anger or frustration or something else that fuels you to confront someone, chances are you will upset them. Instead, take some time to understand yourself first. Then, when you decide to communicate your feelings, you’ll have a clear headspace, and you’ll be ready to discuss maturely. 

 

2. Decide What to Communicate and What Not to Communicate

 

Some things are best kept to yourself. That doesn’t mean repressing them, but if you get annoyed at your friend for going shopping too often, that’s more of a personal problem than a problem you should voice. Before you jump into a conversation, delineate between the things you should discuss and the things you shouldn’t discuss. 

 

3. Think About Who You Trust

 

Opening up about emotions and vulnerability means you are ready to talk to someone about something serious. But that doesn’t mean you trust the person. You may feel vulnerable and just want a listening ear, but if you’re opening up to someone you don’t trust, you could get yourself into trouble. Make sure the person you’re speaking to is someone you trust – and someone who cares about you! 

 

4. Be Caring

 

There’s nothing good about a conversation that spirals into a heated discussion or anger-fueled debate. Be caring and empathetic with your words. Remember that at the end of the day, the person you’re communicating with is a human just like you. They deserve the respect you’d like to be treated with. The golden rule may seem outdated, but it should always be in the back of your mind – especially when you’re opening up in a feely discussion. 

 

5. Be Independent

 

It seems counterintuitive to think about being independent when you’re opening up to someone, but it’s a big component of a healthy discussion. Despite your relationship with this person, you are you. You need to be responsible for your feelings and actions, and you need to understand that no one is responsible for making you feel a certain way other than yourself.