Conflicts are a normal part of life and they tend to happen in virtually every setting. Oftentimes, we avoid conflicts because they make us tense and anxious.
They bring up a lot of self-doubt and discomfort, which typically results in raised voices, increased heart rate, and saying things we don’t really mean.
Even worse, it leads to feelings getting hurt and, sometimes, to relationships being destroyed. No wonder we hate conflicts!
That’s why learning how to resolve conflicts peacefully can be life-changing. In fact, the more we expose ourselves to conflicts, the better we handle any situation, which helps us become more resilient.
So, to help you address conflicts the right way, here are five things I learned from overcoming conflict.
Teaches Us to Respect Other Viewpoints
The reason there’s a conflict in the first person is that there are two opposing viewpoints. But most times neither side gets heard properly, which leads to an altercation, even escalating to major problems.
This is why negotiations are so important, even if you’re confronting a loved one. It shows that we’re willing to be flexible and more open to accept the other person’s opinions.
That doesn’t mean you have to agree with them. It just means you have to be willing to learn how to be prepared to accept them and move on.
Gives Us a Chance to Verbalize Our Needs
People often take for granted who we are as individuals, even those closest to us. This stems from our lack of verbalizing what it is we want or need.
So, we carry grudges and bottle everything inside until we can’t take it anymore. That’s when conflicts arise.
The best thing you can do for yourself is to look at conflicts as an opportunity. It gives you the chance to voice your opinions and share your feelings. As a result, you become less fearful of asking for what you need.
Improves Our Communication Skills
Being a good communicator requires patience and self-control. As with most things in life, the more you practice good communication skills, the better you become.
And the best way to practice is through confrontations, no matter how hard they may seem. Yet, you have to look beyond the fear and be willing to share our thoughts and feelings in a calm, collected way.
You’ll quickly realize that the right words just flow out. So, when the need arises, you can prepare for what lies ahead.
Makes Us Better Listeners
The key to overcoming conflicts is to be a better listener. Many times we're so focused on what we’re going to say next that we don’t really pay attention to what the other person is saying.
That’s not the way to successfully win an argument or resolve a conflict.
To do that, you have to learn how to do things. First, you have to control your impulse to react and blurt out things haphazardly.
The second thing is to learn how to actively listen when someone talks to you. It’s through listening that you can gain a better understanding of the speaker, which enables you to make smarter, wiser choices.
Opens Our Eyes to New Ideas
One of the ways conflicts can be a useful tool is by allowing you to fine-tune your opinions and ideas. As different thoughts are expressed, how you look at things changes slightly.
When you hear someone talking about their viewpoint with regards to a certain topic, you can’t help but clarify your own. You either start modifying your opinion, or you become even more convinced of yours.
A third option is to take part of your ideas and part of theirs and come up with a whole new concept!
That’s the beauty of conflicts. They allow you to generate new ideas and mold new perspectives.
Then, when you realize there are more similarities than differences, you forge a bond. This bond leads the way to establishing trust and enhancing networking. Case in point, it just makes both sides better human beings.
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