If you’re having problems moving forward in life, you may be struggling with self-limiting beliefs. If you’re not familiar with the term, self-limiting beliefs are thought that relate to our abilities, skills, looks, motivation, and other personality traits.
Self-limiting beliefs are often self-identified. This means that they are beliefs that focus on oneself rather than the world in general. However self-limiting beliefs may also be about other people or the world.
What Are Self-Limiting Beliefs?
According to changingminds.org, there are several categories of self-limiting beliefs.
I do/don’t I am/am not: These beliefs define us by things we are or are not. “I am an accountant.” These types of self-limiting beliefs may also be related to things we think we do or don’t deserve. “I don’t deserve a raise because I am a bad accountant.”
I can’t: I can’t self-limiting beliefs are based on the self-image. Typical I can’t self-limiting beliefs are statements that begin with I can’t “I can’t do this because… I can’t learn that because…”
Value Beliefs: Value beliefs are typically based on norms laws cultural restraints and other conditions. However, not all of these are mandatory, and some are highly limiting. “I must clean my house every day until the floor shines.” This is a highly limiting value belief about cleanliness.
Others will/are: these are beliefs based on how other people perceive us or what they will do based on our actions. These are often guesses about other people’s behavior, and they are often wrong. These self-limiting beliefs are wrong because we view people through our own mind rather than through their perception. We don’t have accurate ideas of how other people think because we have not lived their experiences.
How Do Self-Limiting Beliefs Affect Your Life?
Now that you’re aware of various self-limiting thoughts, the question becomes, how are these thoughts affecting your life?
According to Psychology Today, limiting decisions in our lives prevents us from becoming who we wish to become. Self-limiting thoughts do this by affecting our decisions.
Several studies over the past few decades have shown that what we perceive, our emotional state, and how we perform, are all directly tied to our self-belief system. This means that if your self-beliefs are limiting, your actions are going to be self-limiting.
Often people with self-limiting beliefs will not even attempt to test that limit. For example, people who think that they are not attractive will never attempt to ask for a date. People who think they are too old for new jobs will not try to find a more satisfying career. These are examples of how self-limiting beliefs can bring you down without you even knowing. Self-limiting beliefs are controlling your decisions every day.
4-Steps To Eliminating Self-Limiting Beliefs
The lucky thing about thoughts is that you are in complete control of them. Anytime you have a thought,whether it is positive or negative, you can change it. Psychology Today has a four-step process to eliminate self-limiting beliefs. Learning these steps and going through them can help you see more success in your life by reducing your self-limiting thoughts.
1. Write the limiting belief down. Find out how strong each belief is and what emotions they make you feel.
2. Acknowledge that they are beliefs and not truths. Many people struggle with this step, but the reality is a belief is not a fact. Many self-limiting beliefs are limitations that are based on fictional ideas we have about ourselves. When we realize that these are not real or truthful limitations, we free ourselves up to act against these beliefs.
3. Try on a different belief. This may take some practice, but over time, you will be able to change your belief system. An example that psychology today used was to change a self-limiting belief about not being good with money. Instead of saying, “I am not good with money and that is why I have financial difficulties.” You would change that belief to “I am experienced with money because of my past, and I have learned how to handle my finances.” These simple tweaks in your internal dialogue can help you change your actions.
4. Take different action. The final step is to take action on your new belief as if it were true. If you now are trying on the belief that you are a successful artist, you may enter your first art show. While this is very scary, it is also an important step in overcoming negative and self-limiting beliefs.
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