I have never really thought of myself as an angry person. I would always do whatever I could to try and help someone out, nor did I do anything that would hurt someone’s feelings, or I would try as hard as I could not to. Every month we struggle to get by but I really didn't complain. I was just happy that we did have the money to pay our bills and have a place to live even though we barely had enough to survive on after paying the bills. Meditation is very much needed in most people’s lives, no doubt about that.
Even after all that I did not get angry; That changed last week. I really had to meditate to myself when I went with my sister to the doctor last week. My sister is a very hard worker. She never misses work unless it is absolutely necessary. Last year my sister had become sick and finally after being so weak she went to the doctor. He put her in the hospital and gave her 4 bags of blood and said she had pneumonia.
I just couldn't understand how do you lose blood by having pneumonia. As I meditated thinking about last year I was not prepared to hear what the doctor was going to say as my sister and I were driving to the doctor. You see my sister got sick again. She nearly collapsed at work and was taken to the hospital. This time she needed 5 bags of blood. She would keep telling me she was anemic. After the hospital did a CT scan on her they said she needed to go to her lung doctor immediately. That’s where my sister and I were going.
My sister never wants me to worry so she never told me anything and did not want me to go in the room with her when she went in to see the doctor. After I meditated on this I decided when they called her name I would go back with her, and that's exactly what I did. The doctor came in and you could see immediately the concern on his face. He starting reading the results of her CT scan. He was reading something about her lungs.
He talked about something growing in her nodules and spreading to her lymph nodes. He wasn't saying it was cancer but I knew by what he was reading it was. I didn't want to scare my sister so meditating to myself while he was talking, I asked what does all this mean? Instead of asking is it cancer I asked could it be cancer?
His response was “Yes mam.” She has to go for a biopsy in a couple of days to see how far it has progressed. I really find myself angry at this point because she has never smoked a day in her life, and here she is 49 years old with lung cancer. So instead of worrying for the next couple of days and getting angry, I simply practice meditation by praying that god please heal my sister.
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